when life is hard & other things

When life gets hard at least I can wear easy pants.  Seriously if I'm having a hard day the only thing that can make it worse is wearing tight, uncomfortable pants and an uncomfortable bra.

These Everlane easy chino pants are extraordinarily comfortable and yet manage to look chic.  I mean I'm basically wearing grandma pants but they are cut perfectly so don't look it. They are just what I need for those days I just can't. Which lately seems like every stinking day.

Plus they have pockets which makes them pretty darn perfect.  Plus plus, Everlane is offering free 2 day shipping on all U.S. orders til 9pm tonight and free express shipping on all international orders of $100 or more.  Early Christmas present to oneself?  I'm planning to wear these for one week straight and report back here on just how versatile they are.  Consider this look day #1. 

Moving on...

Reasons not to Travel - "Simple things aid my recovery:  my own bed, friends, familiar faces, places and of course my loving and loyal cat.  I have none of these when I travel."

I'm pretty sure I've shared this historical home before but I look at it often.  It's in the top ten list of beautiful homes I keep in my head.

And if by chance, you missed out on the H&M release last year of the GP&J Baker collection blouse I'm wearing, and are still kicking yourself, there is this to the rescue.  I'm stopped everytime I wear something from that collection and asked where I got it.

And i get this.



  1. Hi. I'm a Grandma. I wear pants. I call them Grandmother pants :).

  2. Cocooning in comfortable chinos sounds almost like a PJ day but far more chic! I am a firm believer of dressing up a bit more, paying attention to details adding accessories when one is feeling low. After my mom died I was devastated and numb...I found it so difficult just getting out of bed each day. My mom was a strong woman who faced adversity with grace and she always took such care in her choice of clothing always looking great.
    Your outfit is beautiful, you look particularly chic and hope that you find some ease and peace as you navigate this journey of healing.

  3. Janet, thank you for the links; I enjoyed the Paley and Gilbert pieces. There is a wonderful documentary on the Chernobyl Babushkas. It is such a treat to find a new post from you. I hope that this is the first of another weekly series? I couldn't agree more about bad days and uncomfortable clothes.

  4. Hi Janet, I was able to snag that blouse and the other floral one you posted about last year before they ran out. Also I bought the Dusky blue kimono, I see someone has it listed on ebay for 3 times what I paid for it. I don't know why I haven't worn it yet!
    Traveling is fun but why are we always ready to return home? Probably for the reasons you mentioned. :)
    So is that a big bunch of Trader Joe's alstroemeria you are holding??

  5. Yay- hope this is another daily series! I honestly feel you should professionally model for Everlane- you always seem so elegant and at ease in their clothing. By the way, I live not too far from the historical home you linked. It's such as gorgeous area and I was happy to catch a glimpse of the inside of that stunning apartment. Love your posts and hope you find comfort throughout your journey of healing.

  6. The inner crone article is great, I aspire to be like those strong women. I love your outfit, but then I always do!

    Life is hard for me right now, having gone through a mastectomy three weeks ago and planning on having the other side done soon with opting to stay "flat" (no reconstruction). And since I've always loved clothes, my current wardrobe issues have become daunting to say the least. I think as long as I can find comfortable pocketed bras and inserts it will be half the battle, but so far I haven't been able to find any that give me even a remotely "normal" looking silhouette. I'm counting on my other mastectomy to balance me out. I really don't want to have to change my style and wear big, baggy tops from now on.

    It's so good and reassuring to see you healing after all you've been through :)


    1. I think "staying flat" is a marvellous idea. (Personally, I wouldn't even buy a bra.) Wishing you huge 'Good Luck' with it all.

    2. My cousin had a double mastectomy and is staying 'flat' also.
      Best wishes to you.

    3. oh D i cannot say i know what you are going through but my gosh you are brave to share here and to have to make hard choices. i think i'd go flat too but you never know what you'll do until you are in that exact situation. i'm sending you love and peace and healing...one day at a time. xo

  7. Such an interesting and eclectic post. Sending you a hug - for all of your hard days. "I will walk by faith . . . even when I cannot see." Sometimes that's all we can do - slowly . . . one foot in front of the other . . . moment by moment . . .

  8. YOUR house is in my top ten! Love each corner you share.
    I have found when life gets hard; throw in a good Chick-Flick-Gotta-Cry-Right-Now movie, take a nap, and end with a sit outside and let Mother Nature take over.

  9. This post is so spot on. I’m not dealing with the terrible sorrow you’re learning to cope with mine is health issues that came out of the blue. The thIngs I would love to do I just can’t. I don’t know that ever really will. It’s awkward because I hate whining and want to see family and friends but it’s something I can’t really tolerate anymore. I could have written that article on travel.

    Thank you for the heads up about free shipping!
    You’re not alone Janet. We’re all praying for your peaceful journey to adjust to your new normal.

  10. Nina Paley's article on travel really hit home. I recently returned from a 13 day cruise where we visited 7 major cities. Although I experienced some memorable moments, how could I not, so much of the time I was wishing I was home, in my own bed, with my cat, eating my simple meals and following my own routines. The ship had so many people aboard and was gigantic. I did meet some wonderful people with whom I traveled, and my roommate was a friend and we did get along well sharing the cabin. I know that I am very privileged to be able to do a trip like this but probably would not do it again if I even had the opportunity. Anyway, at least I know I am not alone in feelings.
    That top is so pretty, looking forward to this new series. hoping things get better and less painful. I know you brighten my life.

  11. You are most glamorous in your gramma pants. I should be so lucky. Having lost a husband years ago, I think of you often... Days when you just can't. I'm sorry. Some days you will.


  12. I love those chinos! And, I love comfort when life is hard- those pants are elegant comfort, though. Loved the other clickees.
    D- I hope the surgery goes well, and recovery from both goes well, too.

  13. Thanks for the link to the Elizabeth Gilbert essay. I also aspire to be a badass crone. Dorothy Sayers put it this way, "Time and trouble will tame an advanced young woman, but an advanced old woman is uncontrollable by any earthly force."

  14. You look smashing my friend, you can easily pull off any look. There is no place like home for comfort and ease and mending a heart. Your home radiates love and kindness.

  15. I've been reading your blog since the beginning and almost imperceptibly I'm moving away from nomadism (we've lived in many places - UK and abroad - for anything from 3-6 months) and find myself yearning a little bit for a house like yours: to buy, decorate, garden and generally plant roots. I attribute this new feeling to your blog! Nomading around is great but can be a little anxiety-inducing for me personally. I feel I'm spending so much time on 'admin' ie. organising our lives and where next.... Thanks for the Paley article. I find myself nodding along.

  16. What an enjoyable post, Janet. I loved all the links! I can understand why the historic home is on your top ten list. I enjoyed looking at each room over and over. And the Inner Crone...I had to save that one. What an inspiration. I'm a homebody, so it's nice to know there are others that prefer being home to traveling. I push myself to go, but I'm always very happy to be back. And...you rock those chinos! Looking forward to seeing all the ways to wear them. xo

  17. I just checked back to read about your historical house notation. I commented on your new Instagram post and it reminded me I wanted to read it. So glad I did. I’ve been to Hudson, NY numerous times. My daughter lives in Cold Spring, NY which is near by. I LOVE the shop! I routinely go in and dream. I still regret I didn’t purchase something that was really quite small my last visit. Now I want to figure out where this beautiful house is. It’s a lovely town. A lot of energy is bringing back it’s charm. Check out the shop @aruralresidence. It’s my all time favorite shop there.

  18. Oh my goodness, I totally get the Inner Crone! I think my 91 yr old mother might qualify. In her 80's she fell while gardening at my house, slicing open her calf. No one was home because my mother practices what I call 'drive by gardening'. She keeps her gardening tools in her car trunk and when she 'feels like it' she stops by my or my sisters house to garden. So, still bleeding, she went back to gardening until my husband got home and took her to the emergency room where she needed STAPLES to close the deep wound. Not stitches - STAPLES! The nurse asked her, as is procedure, if she had been abused. My Mom, not understanding this was protocal, answered, "Hell no," with a look that said, If someone tried that I'd give as good as I got. She then asked the doctor if she could drive that night. He looked at her and said, "Are you going dancing?" No, but she did have plans. My Mom is all of 5' and cuddly Italian/American grandmotherliness. Her grandkids think she's a rockstar. My teen son calls her "a legend", which is teen-speak for badass. Just don't cross her.


kindness is never out of style.

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