october bits

I'm sitting here this evening and realizing there were a few links I wanted to share with you this month.  This month sure flew by but dang it was an emotional roller coaster for me and the upcoming holidays have me like...😐

The ROSE silk blouse is available today

I do have a lot of posts planned for November.  I've been invited again to do a big holiday fashion post so there is that and I am looking forward to planning my menu for Thanksgiving.  The garden is not asking much from me these days which is nice bc my energy is pretty low and the change of seasons always has that effect on me.

So here are those links...

What Instagram Influencers are paid

Best of Paris Fashion Week Street Style

Making this soon!

Which would you choose? This Old Kentucky Home or this Park Avenue Apartment?  I lean towards the apartment!

H&M is killing it for fall.  Dear reader I've succumbed to a few pieces..😲

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refreshing a bungalow

Happy Sunday Darlings.  Today I want to share with you my friend Karen's new/old house.  Remember the the ivy league mom makeover?  She recently sold her big home and downsized into this cute little house.  I'm using the real estate listing photos to show you the before.  There was nothing wrong with it but it wasn't her style.  I tried my best to get similar shots so you can see what I changed but real estate photographers have fish-eye lenses that can make rooms appear much larger than real life.  We'll start with a before and then an after and see if this makes any sense shall we?

Before

When you walk in the front door you see the kitchen first.  There is an entry area but really this is what you see.  In these photos the walls look white but they are actually gray and some walls beige.

After

We started by painting the entire interior Benjamin Moore Simply White and that began the refresh.

Before

After

After

The subway tile back splash/upper cabinets really added some sparkle too.

Before

Everything looks white here but in real life it was a dusky gray.

After

Faux shade on ETSY

Before

This is a shot of how the kitchen and living room spaces connect.

After

After

Remember her big Crate and Barrel sofa from the last house?  I didn't think it would fit and it barely does, but they had it custom made with down filled cushions so it was staying.

.

After

We added a rug and some pillows from Home Goods and the JC Penney Roman Shades.

After

Before

After

After

I sure love this light fixture (also on sale) and simple photo shelf from IKEA.  We selected favorite travel photos and printed them in b&w.

After

Before

This is the master bathroom.  It was not Karen's style.  So we did this...

After

 The Sconce Here is also on sale.

After

So pretty.

Before

Kids room.

After

Now Karen's office.

After

The Ikea Ektorp Loveseat and these drapes from Amazon (on sale now.)

Before

Another kids room but it is now the master bedroom...

After

A calm and soothing place to sleep.

Before

After

Custom doors and drawers made for the existing closets.

This whole project was such a labor of love for me.  The job gave me something to do that I find v relaxing so it was really healing for me.  I hope you enjoyed the tour. x

PS - Everlane has free 2-day shipping all day today!

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october garden glow

I took these photos last evening as the golden hour descended upon the garden.  I normally photograph the garden in the early sunlight so these photos have a different feel to them.  As the sun sets this time of year, the light bounces off the trees in a way that you are familiar with wherever you live.

There is that lovely warm glow that doesn't happen in summer.

There's nothing really that special about this town I live in.  It's sleepy compared to Los Angeles.  But there is something to a mundane existence that actually makes life here quite precious. I can't explain it but perhaps you know what I'm talking about.  I always come back to ordinary.  x

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monday blues

Hi.  It's monday and I'm wearing old blue jeans, old blue shirt and these boots.  No thinking involved.

Thank you all for your amazingly honest and many heartbreaking comments on my last post.  I feel so vulnerable putting my (our) story out there.  I almost wish I hadn't but see in the comments that many of you are going thru similar heart wrenching journeys.  I'm overwhelmed by your raw honesty and openness.  The overarching theme is that life is painful but we have to keep going.  Not running but walking through it, feeling it as best we can.  There is no timeline and life will unfold as it should.

In other news I've agreed to have Thanksgiving here.  So November should be full of holiday things...x

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on grief

My grief began before my husband passed away, it began at his diagnosis.  Today is the 6 mo mark of him passing away so I've been grieving now for 1 year and 8 months.  When I see that face up there I want to cry bc I miss it so much.  Prior to his diagnosis his only symptom was heartburn.  He was the fittest man I've ever known.  He was a natural born athlete and excelled at every sport imaginable.

You see the night of his diagnosis he was very out of it bc he'd been sedated most of the day while he underwent testing.  He was awake but not fully aware when the doctor came into his room at midnight and told us he had what appeared to be 4th stage esophageal cancer that had spread to his liver and lymph nodes.  I was devastated but he did not hear that, or maybe he did, I don't know.  My guess is no bc the next morning he said aren't you glad you didn't tell the kids I was in the hospital?  I don't have cancer but we'll figure out what's wrong with me.  I held the diagnosis secret, not telling anyone, for over a month until we went to the oncologist for the official review of tests.  At that point that was the longest month I'd ever experienced.  But tbh not much changed when he received the diagnosis.  He knew he had cancer with a minuscule chance of survival but he never once thought he wouldn't beat it.  Even while on hospice he never not once thought he was dying.  This was really good and hard at the same time.  It was a complete denial of reality that he lived in and I was sort of living in it too only I could see his reality.  The doctors and nurses could see it.  Everyone closely related could see it but most everyone began to believe he'd beat it bc he was adamant, strong and fought so fucking hard.

Most days were unbearable watching him suffer so much.  I withdrew from almost everything and everyone in my life which is not a good idea.  But I was just doing the best I could.  The last month was brutal, absolutely brutal for him.  When he passed on April 17th, at that point it was a blessing bc of the pain and confusion he was in.  I experienced a time of relief myself.

I remember in the beginning the doctors and nurses telling me to take care of myself bc being a caretaker is hard.  I didn't believe them but you know what?  It's freaking hard.  Some days I thought I was losing my mind.  Most days actually.  Anyway, today is hard.  I'm not an anniversary type person but this has been knocking me for a loop for a few days now.  The strangest things trigger it and I just have to sit in it.  This is my reality.  I'm still doing the best I can.

Do you ever wonder what to do when a friend is grieving?  I never knew what to say or do either.  The thing that is clear to me is don't ask what your friend needs, just do something.  Anything.  Most people can't ask for what they need so just do something.  I know now that is what I'll do.  And until you go thru this you don't know.  I don't know why I am sharing this.  Maybe bc I treat this blog as a sort of life journal.  Some days I'm pretty dang ok and others horrible.  But again it's reality.  Thank you for listening and for all the love, kindness and grace you've extended me through this v difficult time.  x

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Everlane Blazer and Editor Boot Review

Gifted from Everlane

Good morning lovelies.  I feel so put together and am so not used to that.  This blazer and boot combo is sorta magical.  The blazer is the first new piece of outerwear in my wardrobe in like forever.  Everlane asked if I'd be interested in reviewing it and the boots and I was ever so happy to do so.

Just look at this Editor Boot.  I hate to use the word sexy but it kinda is, in an old lady way.  It's no stiletto (thank God) but it is sleek and so comfortable.  They say it runs narrow but it feels normal to me.  I'm a 7 and these are 7's.  They feel like I'm walking in flats.  They come in black, bone and this chocolate suede.  Each pair is hand crafted in Italy at this factory that has 32 employees.  So this is a special pair of boots.

This Oversized Double Breasted Blazer was something that has really surprised me.  I didn't think I was in the market for a blazer but I remember taking notes on my wardrobe last winter and writing that it would be nice to have something warm to wear that wasn't a full length coat.  This is it.  So cute, warm, beautifully tailored and stylish.  What's not to love?

I'm wearing it with this Classic White Oxford from American Apparel and a pair of black high rise skinnies.  Oh and my vintage Gucci handbag.  I feel like I should be doing something really important rather than a trip to Trader Joes.  x

PS - Huge Choose What you Pay Sale going on Now

Lots of pretty things...

https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-cashmere-crew2-frostdonegal?collection=womens-sale

https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-cashmere-ovrszd-rnd-v-ivory?collection=womens-sale

https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-cashmere-crop-mockneck-camel?collection=womens-sale

https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-lw-ft-shrnkn-hoodie-offwhite?collection=womens-sale

https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-seersucker-picnic-dress-bluewhitewidestripe?collection=womens-sale

https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-jpnese-goweave-ss-wrap-dress-rose?collection=womens-sale

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