Hello sweet friends. I'm so sorry for not attending to this blog during much of July. It's a roller coaster over here and I'm doing my best to just keep up. Larry is hanging in there the best he can. Chemo is v hard on his body and so he's made the decision to cut back on some treatment. The doctors are not happy but quality of life is the issue. Thank you all so much for all your prayers, emails and amazing comments. I've always known I had the best readers in the blog world but your love and support have given me an unreal sense of love. I mean it's overwhelming the love you have sent us. It's amazing and I/we are so incredibly blessed. Thank you so much.
You know life does go on and there is somewhat of a routine here. Days can vary greatly tho. Last week I accidentally gathered up my cell phone with the sheets and threw it in the washing machine. I was out on my morning walk when I realized what I had done. I was so happy to see that my laptop didn't go in too. It's white and blends in with the sheets!
The afternoons have been so hot so we spend early mornings outside taking slow walks and watering the garden. Many of you were concerned about the recent fires but they were not near us. Again thank you for your concern. I have so many posts swimming around in my head to write for you. I hope and pray this month is calmer. Fill me in on what you guys are up to. xoxo
Quality of life is very important! Larry, you know your body best. Sometimes I think even well-meaning doctors don't think things through, all they can focus on is the treatment. Prayers for you. Janet, continue to take care of yourself, too. Its been so hot I can't think straight! We have also been getting daily monsoons in Connecticut. It's gotten to the point where I have to empty my rain barrels so they are not overflowing - such a switch from last year!
ReplyDeleteHang in there,
Wendy A
I was so happy to hear from you this evening as you and Larry are so often in my thoughts. I wish that things were going better for you and will continue to pray for you both. I recently took my almost yearly trip to beautiful Chincoteague Island in Virginia, which is always special, even when there is a lot of rain. The fires in California are tragic, but I am glad you are not effected by them.
ReplyDeleteDarby
We have dear friends going through a similar situation. They are hundreds of miles away and I text often to send love and light in their hard days. Even so I feel I am not doing much. Can I ask what is something a friend did in these last tumultuous months that has been most helpful or lifted your spirits? xo
ReplyDeletethank you for asking dear kathleen. i've been in your position a few times myself and always felt so helpless. i also see that people really do not know what to say. i never knew what to say either so i don't take it personally. now i'm (we) are on this side of it and the things that stand out for me are the lovely comments here on my blog. some of them have brought me to tears. also, texts and emails from friends are sweet too. i have received a random gift in the mail here and there and they always seem to have come at just the right moment. when i think of the kindness and thought involved to go out of their way to send me a little something, it just brings me to tears too. it's really not the gift, it's the thought behind it. so to answer your question kathleen, i think if i'm ever in the position again i will do little random acts of kindness. whether you are the patient or the caretaker the days are long and hard. a little surprise is lovely. i hope that helps! xoxo
DeleteSo excited to see your post.
ReplyDeleteVery glad the fires were far from you. Admire you and your Larry keeping going along. Praying for you both.
We've had a house full with family visits and for that I'm thankful. Last summer I baked a lot of things from scratch for fun.
This summer I'm learning new waysof cooking healthy foods.
Take care...thinking of you all.
Glad to hear from you, and that Larry is mandating his own treatment, as he should. I think of you both every day. Sending positive, loving thoughts your way, XXxo Robin
ReplyDeleteI was so happy when I saw your new post come up on my reader, I was just reading some of your older posts today, I enjoy your blog so much, I'm so sorry your husband is ill, life certainly takes us on a bumpy ride sometimes, I know that your days are tense and unknown with illness in your home, I know it can be all consuming, you have such a gentle positive manner, I wish you and your husband all the best, I keep you all in my thoughts,, thank you for sharing,,
ReplyDeleteI think we get the readers we deserve. If you have kind and true commenters, it's because you are kind and true. I hope your faith carries you, and Larry, through what you are facing. I imagine there are some dark days. xoxoxox.
ReplyDeleteI've thought of you and Larry often and are keeping you both in my prayers. I can imagine that both of you are the "Keep calm and carry on" kind of people....truly the only way to be especially in tough times. Many prayers for a peaceful weekend :)
ReplyDeleteSo happy to see a new post from you! It's like a letter from home when you're away.
ReplyDeleteChemo is brutal and I pray Larry will feel better and be well very soon.
We've had rain every day for weeks. Wish I could sent it to CA to put out the fires.
Take care dear Janet xoxo
I'm so happy to see a new post from you! I have been thinking about Larry and you often. Chemo is brutal and I understand why Larry would want to cut back.
ReplyDeleteSending you both lots of love and positive energy.
/Bea
So happy to see your blog today. You’ve been in my thoughts lately. We haven’t met in person, but you feel like a friend. It’s been so hot here in Southern California. I go to the stable early and mostly hand walk my horse. I let her choose where we go..sometimes she leads me straight to the wash rack so I can hose her down! This heat has brought my Gardenias to full bloom. They’re one of my favorite flowers and not easy to grow in California. I don’t know if you’ve heard of Insight Timer. It’s a free meditation app that has over 10,000 meditations. It’s part of my morning ritual. Welcoming Acceptance by Bethany Auriel-Hagan has helped me in stressful times. There are also beautiful music meditations..The Winds of Peace, by Chrissy Ortner, and Moonlit Flute. I also use Yoga Nidra Affirmations for Calm by Julie Murphy Yogaressa. Thank you for keeping in touch. ������❤️
ReplyDeleteAh, what a great idea for all of us. A free meditation app. I've never thought of that .I'm going to get it.
DeleteThank you
Love
Ah, what a great idea for all of us. A free meditation app. I've never thought of that .I'm going to get it.
DeleteThank you
Love
Janet,
ReplyDeleteIt was good to see your post. It sounds strange (we don't know each other) but I was worried by the gap since the last one. My heart goes out to you and I hope Larry is able to tolerate the treatments better, and that you, despite the turmoil, and hot weather, can get outside to work in the garden you love so much. Early mornings and evenings are best, at least here in hot S. FL, which is not as hot as other places in the country.
Wishing for the best for you all.
Dearest Janet, Like many before me have said, I get worried when you don't post! Even though we have only "met" through your beautiful blog postings, you have shared so much of your gentle, sweet spirit & I feel like we are kindred spirits, sharing a love of gardening, decorating & hunting for treasures! When I do my morning meditation, I hold you & your husband in my heart.
ReplyDeleteWith the hot weather & more coming for So. Calif., we are trying to keep our garden "hydrated"!! WE are fortunate to live near the coast in Huntington Beach, so we do not have the brutal heat like other areas.
As always, am sending you love, peace, strength and healing. Kathy xxoo
I pray for and think of you and Larry daily. It's such a reminder to all of us that life doesn't always go as planned. We are getting ready for the wedding of our son and future daughter-in-law in five, short weeks. I've enjoyed rereading through your posts of Alex's wedding. What a special day! I'm glad you and Larry are doing things your way. I wouldn't expect anything less. You are both very special! xoxo
ReplyDeleteHi Janet, so good to see a post from you. I think of you and Larry often. What a tough road you're both walking, but you are both doing so with such grace. I admire Larry for taking a stand regarding his treatment, and you for allowing him the dignity of doing so. I hope Larry feels better. Love to you both.
ReplyDeleteDear Janet,
ReplyDeleteThinking of you and your husband... your home and garden are so peaceful and healing. Sending all warm, good wishes to you both... Debbie
Janet, how brave of Larry to take a stand on his treatment. The quality of life during chemo can be awful, many of us know that from experience. I hope you two can enjoy a quiet respite. We had temps of 108 here in Austin last week. Our routine of walking in the morning was not possible as the dry air felt like a furnace blast. Hopefully we can get out again soon. It is so beautiful here, I feel so lucky to be able to view the hills of West Lake from our windows. Best to you and Larry.
ReplyDeleteSo happy to see a new post from you Janet , Wishing you and Larry the best ❤️
ReplyDeleteSo good to see a new post, Janet. I am a longtime reader and yet have only commented a couple of times over the years. I love your blog and your spirit and I will continue to keep you and Larry in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI think of you. A lot. I really do. I click onto your blog frequently to see what's up.
ReplyDeleteAnybody understands why you don't post more frequently right now, Janet. Your readers love you; you have to do what's best for you and Larry; your hands and mind are full of other things. You have a different focus right now, rightly on him and your day-to-day life of navigating/coping with serious illness, which changes everything and becomes a new norm. And it's very wearing/wearying to live life with constant vigilance and worry when all we want is to feel calm and secure; lighter.
What am I doing with my current days? I'm not one of the people who gets to go on the fab summer vacays. At least not at this time in my life. Avoiding the heat outside - -this is one of the hottest, most humid summers I can remember for SoCalif although I guess I just forget - - and staying cool is my daily aim, but I recognize that being too sedentary indoors is making me creaky and stiff, not enough movement, so I'm trying to walk at night after the sun gives us a break (I'm not a morning person, although I so wish I was). We go to the shore a couple of times a week to cool off; end of day, at sunset...I love the beach in early evening; the ocean is so diff at night.
The garden is suffering; I try to help it with watering every day, ever mindful that we could go into restriction at any time due to heat and drought. We took a drive into one of the canyons yesterday and were taken aback at how dry and crisp everything is; I so do fear another wildfire like last December in Ventura/Santa Barbara counties (how can anybody in northern OR southern California not now fear wildfire more than ever; these firenado events...and California being the state with the highest incident of fire in the U.S.).
So, I'm looking forward to any cooler weather; maybe come November right on the heels of Halloween, although I feel I can't count on anything anymore seasons-wise as they're not following the historical course, at least in my experience or memory. Seeing a lot of squirrels in various parts of town, though, who seem to be scurrying around and making me wonder that they're not already putting away some food for winter. I try to think that early November is just 3 months away and of course the older I get, time seems to fly faster than ever.
But won't it be fine to get out fall décor again. The different colors - - it's when I go for faded orange and purples. Coppery stuff in the kitchen. And I begin to hanker for the taste of pumpkin-anything.
As always, fondly and with my heart, sending both you and Larry my most healing thoughts and prayers for daily ease in this difficult time.
I was especially thinking of you yesterday - actually it was last night during a wakeful time. Praying for you and others I know in difficult circumstances was what I did until falling back to sleep. Thank you for updating us when you can. You are an example to us all - both of you - in how you're handling things. Sending light and healing your way.
ReplyDeleteoh AJJ! how good to hear from you darling bean.
ReplyDeleteLarry is right. quality of life has to enter into it.
I have congestive heart failure and Afib. and the meds for them both are debilitating. I finally decided to just live my life as healthfully as I can. the doc was not pleased. he said that taking it would extend my life. REALLY? how to be miserable and live to 100 in "do as I say!"
sorry. nope. maybe for some people. not for me.
and laughter helps. sending you a link. have you heard of this woman? she is fabulous. Jeanne Robertson. very short clips from her talks. she's NOT a stand up comedienne. she just tells stories from real life. and she's hilarious. good medicine.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14msmjowzrc
I never know if that will work or not. just google Jeanne Robertson speaker... if it doesn't!
you won't be sorry.
love you! and am picturing Larry well and You too.
and I was hoping the book in the second picture was the Urantia Book! I see you haven't lost your touch in photography. XOXO
So difficult to listen to the beat of our own drum against the drug regimes. Good for you and good luck in everything!
DeleteYou and Larry have been in my thoughts and prayers. My husband went through a C-scare 3 years ago. We went through surgery and chemo. I'm relieved to say things are good now. It's a difficult road and the 2 years of health issues behind us, I can say that medicine advances made it better than it could have been.
ReplyDeleteBest to you always and I pray Larry will so be on the back side of this health concern.
xo,
Karen
Is Cannabis legal where you reside? A much gentler, natural approach to an ugly ailment.
ReplyDeleteSending the both of you strength and courage for this trying time. I’ve enjoyed your blog for a long time and admire your grace and kindness. Glad you feel support from your many readers and fans.
ReplyDeleteSending you and Larry warm thoughts from Italy. Not a day goes by that I don't think of both of you. XXo Robin
ReplyDeleteHello Janet, I am so sorry to hear of Larry's illness, and I wish you both strength and peace of mind as you deal with it. I am sure he couldn't be in more caring and capable hands than yours. Here in the UK we're having a prolonged heatwave, but you would probably just call it summer!
ReplyDeleteWith much love and healing thoughts, Judy xx
Haha - agree. It's been late 20s - early 30s in the UK and everybody is done in! Hasn't rained for weeks. All so unusual.
DeleteJanet, sending you healing thoughts and peace. I've enjoyed your blog for a number of years and been a lurker-reader. Quality of life is important. My dad stopped chemo for the same reason, and it was the right decision. Anna Marie xx
ReplyDeleteQuality of life is what matters most. And through it all you're thinking of us. You have such a kind heart. Sending Healing thoughts and hugs your way!
ReplyDeleteBetsy
Praying for you both. What a journey you have been on. Praying that your husband gets strength and health back and that you feel peace and courage as you and Larry walk this difficult path. Your slow morning walks in the garden sounds life giving, and beautiful. XO
ReplyDeleteSo good to hear from you. I have been where you are with Larry. It isn't easy yet those days after the meds stopped were some of our the best. We enjoyed every minute and took nothing for granted. It was the right decision for us and I pray for you too. You ask what I have been up to...simple...babysitting the new love of my life, my toddler grandson. He is my heart, smart, funny and so much fun. Our weather has been hot, humid and very wet. It rained 22 of the 31 days in July here on the NC coast. My garden and my skin look great but it hasn't been much fun. I hate it because Fall is almost here and we seem to have missed sunshine this summer. I think of you often and prayers always are said. xo
ReplyDeleteWhat am I up too........GOOD QUESTION!I should write a blog post!Summer is running by.........we had home made pizza by The Italian outside last night and we have houseguests this week........
ReplyDeleteI want to buy a juicer so I can do the CELERY JUICE thing in the morning!Do you know about the benefits?
I am reading The MEDICAL MEDIUM and loving it!Debating about cutting my hair...........
Need to deadhead the roses.....................
I forgot you have MY CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LOVE MY FIAT 500!
XX
Janet,
ReplyDeleteIt is so nice to "hear" from you! Larry must be tired. It makes sense that he wants to pause the harsh elements involved in treatment. Like many of your readers, I think of you and Larry often. I hold your kindness in my heart, send it back to you three-fold. Take good care.
I was so happy (and, truthfully, a little nervous) to see you pop up in my feed this morning. I will continue to keep you and your husband in prayer.
ReplyDeleteHow lovely to see a post from you - still sending positive thoughts your way. I've been on a bit of a Bloomsbury Set trail this summer (scorching here in England!) and visited Charleston farmhouse and Monk's House in Sussex - also saw an open air production of The Tempest at Charleston. Then visited Sissinghurst again (which I think you may have visited?) and came away with Nigel Nicolson's book Portrait of a Marriage which I am devouring, alongside A History of the World by Andrew Marr. Both really interesting, but really conversational, and thoroughly recommended - if you'd like a copy of either let me know how to get it to you. Also wanted say that, just because the doctors say something can be done, doesn't necessarily mean it should be done - well done for taking control. Wishing you both all the best x
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking about you both and wondering how Larry has been doing. I hope you are finding comfort in each others company and are enjoying this season in your lives. I will continue to hold you both in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteKeep fighting. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI am always happy to see your posts and beautiful photos. So many of us care for you and Larry and wonder how you are doing. Thank you for remembering us with your updates.
ReplyDeleteLife is good here in Kentucky. The beauty here is superb, healing, calming. Several times a week we try to take long country drives and walks, alfresco meals nearly every day. Getting settled in our new home we built. Leaving soon to fly to Utah to visit our wee grandchildren and family there. Take care dear Janet and Larry.
Thanks for your post! San Diego is frying along with the rest of the state as we watch the 14,000 firefighters and first responders battle to save lives and homes here in California. My worries are small in the face of their and your challenges. Sending all a cool breeze to brush your brow and bring relief in your struggle. xx-hb
ReplyDeleteHappy Tuesday 7 August. Very hot here in Kent, UK. Grass everywhere is bleached to straw. Days passing in a heat haze. Keeping to your regime of simple, frugal and refined - the fewer things in the house the better for me. After some crazy spending on skincare I've returned to my first love: Dr Hauschka. I am so excited! I love having NO choices: it's so relaxing. Sending all love across the Atlantic.
ReplyDeleteDear Janet,
ReplyDeleteI was hoping for an update and thank you for doing so. Still sending up prayers for both you and Larry. What's been up with me this summer? Pretty much spent most of the time purging stuff, working in my yard and completing deferred house projects. Nothing exciting, but very rewarding. Looking forward to my vacation (Newport Beach) next month quilt free having tackled that to-do list!
Lots of love to you!
Renee in (Smoky) Northern California
Thank you for posting...I have been thinking of you both and was rather concerned that you had been absent...Larry must do what is right for him.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about the cellphone...a friend of mine did the same thing and she put hers in a jar with rice and it was saved...
We have a serious wildfire here on Vancouver Island...its farther up island from us but an emergency has been declared. Its too hot to work outside today as we are having a heatwave.
Hugs to you Janet...
XO
Hello Janet-You and Larry continue to be included in my daily prayers. Thank you for your honesty. I feel it’s just a matter of time and we all experience something if not the same but similar to what you’re both going through. I often wonder what my decision or my hudsband’s will be if/when that day comes. So what have I been up to? Well, after years of searching for a small home in the village that’s walkable to just about everything we finally found one! I actually stopped even looking. This opportunity was offered to us to look at before it was even listed. It just felt like a place to call home the minute I walked in the door. It’s a humble little bungalow that we feel so fortunate to soon call home. Our home sold within a couple days. I have to say your current situation helped me make this decision. Isn’t it funny how we touch people’s lives even though we never met? So now I’m eliminating, not that we had that much, and getting ready for the move in 2 1/2 weeks. With this move we’ll be able to get by with one car. That feels good too. Hugs Janet. Please know you’re not alone. Peace
ReplyDeleteKathy. Kcarr Instagram
I've been a reader a long time and never commented, but I've been thinking of you and Larry often over the last few months. Not knowing what to say is quite right, but here goes: sending you both tons of love and light and good wishes. Hope you get the rest and healing you need during this difficult time.
ReplyDeleteDear Janet,
ReplyDeleteIt is a relief to see your new blog post today. You two are still in my prayers.
Sincerely,
Debra from SENC
So happy to read a post from you. I hope you are taking care of yourself as well as Larry. You are in my prayers. Stay cool.
ReplyDeleteI hardly ever (if ever) comment on your blog, but I appreciate you and your thoughts, words, and sense of beauty. I am so very sorry for the trouble you and Larry are going through now. Just know that you are stronger than you ever thought.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update on you and Larry. Will continue to keep both of you in my prayers. Sending love 💖
ReplyDeleteSo glad to hear from you. Thinking of you and Larry everyday. Sending you good thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI check regularly and am so pleased when I see a post from you Janet. Thinking of you both
ReplyDeleteHi Janet, I know we don't "know" each other, but I've always enjoyed your blog and I think about you and your husband every once in awhile because I have other friends that are battling cancer, too. Such a horrible, unfair disease. Love and prayers to you both. xoxo
ReplyDeleteso good to see your post. I think of you and Larry even though I have never met you...isn't it funny how blogs bring us together. Life is at a busy time for us here in Illinois.....one daughter in college and a son in his junior year of high school. the sweet summer past far too quickly. I tried my best to soak up every minute that I could. I turned 50 this summer and am embracing all that this new season has to offer. Looking forward to more posts from you when you are ready. In the meantime, I carry you and Larry in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteDear Janet~is there a way any of us can send a gift to you, perhaps a gift card for delivered food? It was so kind when we experienced sickness and sadness in the past few years. If I lived closer, I would deliver you a vegan feast myself and come do your laundry for you. Sending you love and hope from east Tennessee. April
ReplyDeleteoh mrs white you are so sweet of you to offer but really we are ok. if you lived closer i would welcome you over for some tea and a house and garden tour. wouldn't that be lovely?! i would love to visit tennessee one day! xoxo
DeleteDear Janet, I apologize for not commenting sooner...Tony and I were on a much needed and well overdue vacation in Mendocino. I tried to comment on his i pad but had trouble doing so. I am sorry that Larry felt the need to cut back on his chemo but you are right that it is about quality of life. I hate the fact that I have to take these darn antidepressants (worry about the effects on my liver) but I am in a much better place on them. That being said, the one I take at night made me a total zombie and so clumsy the next morning I finally cut back a 1/2 a pill. (did not tell my doc) I feel so much better now and suffered no consequences by scaling back. Sometimes you have to do what is best for you. You are both in my thoughts every day. Looking forward to your next post!
ReplyDeleteLinda xoxo
so glad you two got away. you've both been under so much stress. i'm seeing just how stressful it is for caregivers. talk soon. x
DeleteI've never commented, but am a longtime reader - love your style and approach to life. Know that although we've never met I hold you in my thoughts as you go through this challenging time - checking for updates, and appreciating your graceful check-ins even though you owe it to no one. Peace and blessings be with you.
ReplyDeleteHello Janet, I never could have made it through two different chemos, surgery, a third chemo, radiation and targeted therapy if I didn't get acupuncture. It helped with side effects like nausea so I felt well even though I was ill and was able to eat and sleep and keep going to treatment. I've also seen acupuncture help people feel more comfortable whether they were in treatment or not.
ReplyDeleteWishing you and Larry restful moments in the days ahead.
Laraine
thank you laraine, i passed the acupuncture idea to larry and he is considering it. thanks! x
DeleteAnything I can do- like a commenter mentioned? A housekeeper, catering, SOMETHING from Italy, to help you out? Sending big hugs from bella Italia, love, Robin
ReplyDeletethank you sweet robin but really just your prayers and good thoughts are super welcome! xoxo
Delete