12.10.2012

she's got the blues





i do and i don't think it is unusual for this time of year though so i'm not gonna be all hard on myself.






i got these pants at target back in august with the intention of taking them to new york but never did.
i kept them b/c they fit and they remind me of the 60's.






i'm wearing them with a backwards cardi.  





i'm including this close-up picture b/c apparently some of you want to see my wrinkles.
i've earned and love every one of them.







so are you all happy and everything or do you get blue around this time of year too.




71 comments:

  1. If that is blue, it still looks good on you. It won't matter if someone points out how wonderful things are and that you are somehow wrong to feel that way. I am 60 years old so I have had a few Christmases and I know that sometimes the best thing to do when I'm blue during the holidays is just sit with the feeling and don't outright reject it. Afterall, it is really just a feeling and another one is surely coming along right behind it. I send you wishes for all the best Janet.

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  2. Aw. Sorry honey. I don't feel blue, being more prone to anxiety than anything else, but I feel, yes, anxious, about meeting all the cross-currents of expectation. Can't keep everyone happy. I don't think you owe anyone good cheer.

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  3. I'm sorry you're blue Janet. I get this way too, I had a day last week when my whole body felt heavy with it, I'm up and down but I do think it is normal and I've learned to appreciate those cheery days.
    I think there are a lot of expectations this time of year and I also find it a bit hectic. Slowing down is what works for me. xo!

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  4. I rarely get it in December, because I'm such a big kid and I love Christmas and the all the fairy lights make the darkness easier, but certainly I go up and down. I know it will pass for you, I'll cross my fingers that it passes quickly.

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  5. I cope with the Christmas blues by running away to Florida! Last year we spent 2 weeks, this year it's the whole month of December. Works wonders!

    I love my wrinkles too, but didn't always. Wearing the cardi backwards looks awesome, and nice ass by the way.

    S
    xo

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  6. Like the rest I go up and down, but like Lisa, tend to be more prone to anxiety than anything else (which does get me sort of blue.) The holiday season is always a mixed thing, full of expectations etc. However, you look fantastic and I love the pants on you.

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  7. Oh yeah, up and down, anxiety....all of it comes and goes and hopefully is normal - LOL. You look fabulous, love the pants!

    Laura

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  8. I, too, am more in the anxiety camp this time of year. Whether facing anxiety or the blues, I think it is so important to take good care of yourself...a little something to look forward to everyday really helps me---if it is a good cup of coffee in the morning, a Modern Family episode on my DVR to laugh with, or a nice long walk with my dog, those little things go a long way for me! I hope that you find little moments of pleasure in your day, sooner rather than later.

    Have never seen the backwards cardi--great idea!!! You look absolutely amazing!!!

    Take care,
    Mary P

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  9. I am not prone to melancholy...but I did grow up with a bipolar dad who died on 12/17/94 when I was only 35. So I tend to think of him at this time of year and have a moment or two of blue-ness. I remember sitting by his bed as he was dying in the house I grew up in...and looking out the window at the neighborhood Christmas lights and it just seemed garish to me at that moment in my life. So I allow myself a little blue and then shake it off. I've got two adorable little grandkids now, and that makes the holidays fun. And on another note... girlfriend, you look amazing and epitomize (for me anyway) what aging gracefully looks like.

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  10. You look utterly fabulous, love those pants and how hot you look in them. I'd rather see a beautiful woman like you with a few laughter lines than some bland botoxed celeb.
    I hate this time of year, too. It's dark, cold and grey and people keep harping on about families when mine's nearly all gone. I want sunshine, beaches and hedonism. xxxxx

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  11. No, I never get the blues. I've had a few dark days here and there but I am an eternal optimist. I think it's in my blood type: B+... Be Positive, get it? ;^) I'm not one of those crazy happy people or a little ray of sunshine, on the contrary my demeanor is usually quite serious but I always see the glass half full with the added bonus of room available for more.

    The pants are funky.

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  12. Loved LPC's kind and sensible comments. Couldn't say it better. But depth and growth come with a little darkness, like plant's roots. I wonder if, living the simple life as you do, maybe the" so-muchness" of our society a at this season isn't a part of it. I share that. This is the time when daily routines and tasks help me a lot. For instance, I made your bread yesterday and it was fabulous. Thanks for the gift.

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  13. I too get the blues from time to time. This time of year I chase them away by nesting at home...lots of cooking, reading, knitting, candle-lighting and plenty of sleep. This time of year can be really hectic if you let it. The only thing I keep on my calendar is the gym. I'm pretty gentle with myself about all the other "shoulds". It really helps for me to embrace the winter as a time to return to my home and the comfort it offers.

    Janet, I'm sending you warm, cozy vibes to lift you spirits. Hope you feel brighter soom.

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  14. Janet,
    Sorry you're feeling a little blue...I do think it's very normal for this time of year for just those reasons you mentioned. But all that aside...you look stunning...you certainly know how to rock a backwards cardi and a pair of Target pants. Maybe you'll get your magazine from Tabitha today with Jack White gracing the cover...that will help!
    xo
    annie

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  15. I always get the blues this time of year. Christmas just isn't the same as it was when I was a kid, it always brings back memories of loved ones that have passed, we're getting close to the end of another year which marks passing time, and I've got a mediocre blog. Ain't no happiness in a mediocre blog!

    Psst: Your sweater's on backwards.

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  16. Janet,
    You look so cute!:

    I get the "blues" too living in a state where it is grey and rains a lot: I find having a white decor helps and lots of flowers.

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  17. Urban Cottage is no mediocre blog--it is a very upscale blog. And, yes, I get the blues this time of year, and this year, getting to move into our new home this week after the fire, it is a joyous, grateful time.
    And I cried this morning. Very hard.
    I am the first person to say that my life has been blessed because I did not die in the fire.
    And even though I am scarred, and my face is now very scarred, and when I go out into public I have to deal with either stares or people looking and then quickly looking away, and I am always the only person looking this way in a crowd, I have my life, I have my ability to function in spite of some pain issues that will be resolved, and that is what is most important--that I have my life.
    For the most part, I am happy 95% of the time, but sometimes I am not.
    I cried this morning because today begins a series of steps to getting moved in--the anticipation, the work, and the past 6 months of my life changing is just overwhelming sometimes--so I had some tears.
    But I have learned to float since the accident.
    Floating is a good thing--I can acknowledge my emotions and not get too caught up in it all.
    There has to be balance--and on this earth, sooner or later we ought to notice all the dichotomies of life--young/old, girl/boy, tall/short, good/bad.
    One pretty much doesn't exist without the other...So we know things will not always be good, but will not always be bad.
    Focusing and remembering the good when the bad is near helps a lot.
    A good book, a good movie--they help too.
    I will respect my feelings both good and bad, and I will float.
    -Suzanne in Illinois

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    1. Suzanne,

      Thank you for your very kind note! I guess my comment is a little out of context to everyone else. Janet and I have joked that we see some many blogs with several thousand followers and we don't understand them. We're much happier having smaller "mediocre" blogs that have a familiarity between visitors.

      I don't often come back to look at comments but I've not seen you share the feelings about your experioence so openly before. I think, and hope, I join the many others here in sending you a big virtual hug!

      Steve

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    2. Thank you , Steve. You are a gentleman.
      -Suzanne

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    3. Suzanne----So Happy to hear that you are moving into your house!! Yippee...happy dance......Sheree

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  18. janet-in my line of work, i deal with people who have the blues all the time. what it try to tell them, and what i also tell myself: be nice to yourself, remember it will pass, tomorrow is another day...

    steve, i like your blog and do not think it is mediocre....be nice to yourself.....hee hee..

    off the subject, i wanted to let you know about this new product i tried. i went to the website of "beyond meat" in search of a meat-like substitute that is vegan, gluten free, no chemicals, used real food to make it, and tastes good. (i even contacted the company to makes sure the previous statement is true and they said, "yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes") apparently they have been working on this for a long time. so i called whole foods, and talked to a guy named joe in the prep food area. he packaged up this new product for me and i brought it home and made a dish similiar to chicken piccata over gluten free noodles. I like it. from what i remember chicken and how it tasted, this is very similar. joe told me that when people taste it at the salad bar, they come back and request more. it so new, that the company is still working on packaging and pricing. couldn't find an email addess for you, so thought i would just let you know about it here on your blog. i enjoyed last months receipes.
    jess

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  19. Normally, I am in poor spirits this time of year.
    However, I started taking a large amount of vitamin D
    about a month ago. I am feeling very cheerful and,
    energetic!

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  20. First, I am so glad to hear Suzanne is into her new house! Enjoy your holiday in your new home Suzanne. And your comments about floating are very wise. (Ever seen the movie Home for the Holidays with Holly Hunter? "Just float" is in that very funny movie :). For me this has become a bittersweet time of year. We are too far from family but the most able to travel - so it can be tiring to move through three states every x-mas break, but worth it to see everyone. We have a family member that we never know for sure will make it to each Christmas for the last 7 or so years, so though each year is a struggle, it is also a triumph. I think the blues are very normal as we miss those gone from us and just get tired from crazy schedules. But for me it is balanced by my kids. They are such a comfort, and very good at hugs :). We all need more of those.

    And those pants rock Janet! Your blog is one of my happy things each day.
    S in Seattle

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    1. Thank you, S.
      I have not seen this movie, but I will watch it for sure!
      There is a very old book by Claire Weeks called HOPE AND HELP FOR YOUR NERVES.
      She talks about "floating" as a way to stop anxiety. I read that book way back in the early 80's when I first became a mom.
      It's a book well-respected for helping people with panic attacks. Way back then I was young and thought I was being challenged as a new mother with a colic son. Now that I look back, those days were pretty awesome. I am glad I read that book, however, all those years ago. I wonder if it's even still in print.
      -Suzanne

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  21. I want to run away to Paris and pretend to be someone else. You look wonderful even in, and if you are blue.
    And may I say, with equal humor and sincerity - Happy holidays AND Bah Humbug ;)

    Miranda
    SF Bay Area

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  22. I am blue too but this is due to some painful personal issues I am going through. I hope it will get better when the days get longer, even if not necessarily because of it. Hope you feel better soon. Blue or not, you look great, love those pants on you!

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  23. Janet - many good thoughts your way! I am having a blue Christmas as well, with the death of my dad and some bad stuff at work. I am just being good to myself and not trying to tell myself to snap out of it! I always wonder about people who don't get the blues. They are luckier than I!

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  24. Melancholy happens. Therefore, we all need to be kind to one another. And pishaw, what wrinkles and gray hair??? Girl, you look FAB-u-lous!!! Chin up and keep smiling. :o)

    I'm sending you some Christmas Cheer, and wishing you a Happy New Year!

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  25. All WILL be fine Janet and it will pass only when you are in the middle of it it doesn't seem so... You look wonderful as ever though - very chic and I am loving the pants and the back to front cardi - genius ! XXX S

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  26. Janet, I see no wrinkles at all in your close-up...you are lovely. Love the idea of wearing a cardigan backwards. I am sorry you are feeling blue. I have a difficult time getting into the Christmas spirit, but once there I find my melancholy lift somewhat. Have a wonderful week! Bonnie

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  27. Never tried a cardi backwards, must give it a whirl xo

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  28. LOVE the backwards! I am SO doin' that! :)

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  29. We wore our cardis backwards in high school/college in the 50s and felt very daring! I had forgotten - thanks for the reminder - I'm going to copycat you tomorrow! Actually, after over 50 years I still have one of my wool cardigans! What a testimonial to buying classic clothes that do not go out of style.

    The best way I climb out of a funk is to think about my blessings - and there are a lot of those! Also - reduce expectations - we set most of them much too high. We live in an imperfect world with imperfect people - but it's still a gorgeous and wonderful place. Just float above the awful stuff. We don't have to allow it to drag us down and that never makes it all better anyway. The world does become a better place when we put joy into our hearts and spread THAT around! Go cheer someone up and enjoy feeling wonderful when you do it!

    Love and Joy to you, Janet. Your blog is so terrific and touches so many people's hearts. Feel great about that! ~ Jan


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  30. Janet your blog always is a bright spot for me no matter the time of year. i am not really "blue" but generally this is not my fav time of the year. first my b-day is in dec and getting another year older
    is a downer. then there is the mad x-mas dash. stores are crowded--people are rushing around--driving too fast--i've simplified x-mas but most people i know have not. so i see people doing too much & getting exhausted & that that brings me down. then there's the commercialism of x-mas. hate that. then there is the end of the year passing. the short daylight. dark at 5p.m and colder.
    my mother died right after x-mas years ago & so did a beloved aunt 2 years after my mom -- and i still miss
    them both very much..............so i try and be happy about music and gatherings with friends at this time of year but if i could skip christmas, i would.

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  31. Janet, something to cheer you. I recently found Colleen patrick-goudreu podcast,"vegetarian food for thought " free on Itunes. She is a vegan educator and author. Her podcasts have veen accompanying me through many mundane tasks and reminding me of the uncoditional compassion that I am trying to embody. Hope you like her!

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  32. Always blue around the holidays... have not worn a back to front cardi since high school.

    Those are not wrinkles, they are expression lines, and you look fabulous!

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  33. No real blues here either love all the simple things like lights and cookies and egg nog. I do have a moment or two when we sit at the table and I think of those family members who are no longer with us.
    Embrace the feelings though because they will pass and Janet your wrinkles are cute and so is your cardigan done up in back...did Larry need to help with the buttoning? I don't think I could manage that feat on my own!

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  34. I love that you wear your cardigans backwards, not to age myself, but back in the day I use to wear my v neck sweaters backward all the time! Love target, and love your wrinkles, I have them too, and I love each one.
    Brandi

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  35. What wrinkles, Janet? All I see are beautiful laugh lines. They become you.

    I think it's actually pretty common to have the blues this time of year. Probably more people struggle with it than we realize, because everyone's trying so hard to be "up" for everyone else. It's a time of great expectations (impossible to be fulfilled), much nostalgia for times gone by, and awareness of time and loved ones passing. Shortened hours of daylight don't help either, but as someone else mentioned, I've found taking vitamin D has really helped with my seasonal blues.

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  36. Thank you for being real.

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  37. Yesterday I was decorating the house and feeling melancholy - 16-year-olds are never at home but we MUST do it, no? Then my wasband showed up with a bottle of wine and two helping hands and his thanks that I'm the one that makes the Christmas place.
    And, yes, oh my gosh, "Home for the Holidays" is one tradition our not-so-traditional family never misses :)

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  38. Pants are great!

    I'm way too OCD-ish to wear anything backwards...would drive me nuts!

    I believe the blues this time of year can be thwarted with a good dose of vitamin D and some volunteer hours-so many good causes out there that need help.

    I am also old enough to know that some years ask the questions and some years reveal the answers-yet if one lives in the now, it's all OK.

    Oh, and IMHO, the blogs that the masses follow are the mediocre ones :)




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  39. I couldn't resist commenting. Well written!
    Visit my web page : earn extra money quick

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  40. I often feel blue in the lead up to Christmas. It's a lovely season and there is much to celebrate but I've come to realise that it also bring everything that's emotional for me into high relief - loss, grief, expectations, family stuff... it's all highlighted. I get through it by understanding that there's a gap between the ideal picture of Christmas I see presented everywhere in magazines, on TV... and what's beneath the surface of life with all its various shades and dips and highs and lows......I think part of my pain at Christmas is that what I feel doesn't match what is being presented out there and I feel like some kind of failure for it.....but the only response to that is to my kind to myself and even of i have the blues to know that's ok.

    I love your cardy worn backward and the print on your pants is lovely. You look a treat. I enjoy your blog a lot. I was feeling blue today even though the sun was shinning. When I dropped by and saw your post I felt less alone. Thanks for your honesty.

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  41. Beautiful outfit and beautiful pants. Wrinkles, very few, are also lovely.

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  42. Janet, You are natural and lovely. Perfect.

    This time of the year gets me down too. It's true it's the end of another year and there is much to reflect on.. Hoping you find some joy and thanks for bringing reality into it.

    xo
    Kim

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  43. So pleased I've just discovered your beautiful blog, you have your newest follower here! Wonderful photos and you have a lovely natural glamorous style.

    You're right, lots of people get down around xmas and New Year, it's hard for anyone who doesn't have the perfect family or life set up (and let's face it, who does?!). Hang in there, it'll be over soon for another year.

    I've recently started my own clothing blog, set in the wilds of the countryside here in Devon England, do take a peek and let me know what you think!

    Emalina
    www.kikiandthegypsy.blogspot.co.uk

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  44. I had a hard time getting this comment to post yesterday....I was going to initially write that I feel extremely blessed and that everything is going okay but the truth is, I am a little blue too. So many could of's, would of's, should of's that I let slip by this year...again. It's so much different now that the kids are grown and what I wouldn't do to go back in time for a Christmas when they were little. Time goes by so quickly and it just plain stinks when family is not around and there's so much you want to do but have to settle for getting just some of it done. I sometimes get caught in what others want to do for the holidays and usually those things go against everything I want to do....next year I will be stronger in doing what I feel is right. I just may boycott the whole Christmas thing and sit myself in church everyday, celebrating what's really important to me. I think then of others who's challenges everyday are far greater than mine and wonder why in the heck I am blue. Reading Suzanne's comments and others who have gone through much more than I have this past year, really puts everything into better perspective. Sending you and everyone else a big hug.....xo

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  45. I once had a terrible time around the holidays. They brought out such sadness in me that I dreaded their arrival. I don't know what has changed, but I love them now. Perhaps because I am a different person than I was then- always trying to compete with women who baked better than I or decorated more expensively. When I stopped competing and actually just let myself experience the holidays without the hoopla, I began to love them. I even left friendships that seemed like nothing but a competition.

    Your backwards cardi is genius. It would also look great with a jeweled collar (fake of course).

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  46. Wow, you look good. Wrinkles and all.
    xo

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  47. Janet,

    Funny you should ask...the tears started flowing yesterday and wouldn't stop because everything was going wrong. I was supposed to have a new range delivered yesterday after only having a working cooktop for the last 3 weeks and they called to tell me they haven't received the range from the manufacturer, couldn't say when I would get it. So here I am 2 weeks before Christmas with no oven and trying to figure out what to do next. On top of all this I don't have a tree yet and decided it's only going to be the little table top tree this year, it just too much work, even though I know my grown daughter will be not happy. My housework is backed up because I was recouping from 2 fractured ribs recently and add menopause and helping with aging in-laws that is not making life fun either. So I guess I answered your question. I officially have the blues! :/ But on the flip side, I know a lot of this stuff will pass and I'm certainly not as bad off as some people.

    Linda
    xo

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  48. I love your haircut and it frames your lovely face beautifully!

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  49. Just happened upon this blog...don't know you but have to say...you look fabulous, what a lovely shape you have, your hair is terrific, love the cut (may grab this picture to take to my salon next visit), so thanks for the inspiration...understand those "blues", they come with the territory, life.

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  50. I am way to busy to get into the blues-mood. It's more boogie around here.

    hope you feel better soon!
    Paula

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  51. Thanks for this honest post that highlights what quite a few of us are feeling. The two weeks leading up to Christmas are the toughest of the year for me. I'm usually happy and cheerful, unfortunately, not this time of year. I miss a family I no longer have, and all the TV specials, songs, magazines and so forth just make it that much harder. I try to do more for others this time of year, that seems to help.

    I agree with some of the other posters, knowing we aren't alone helps a bunch! Oh, and those pants are terrific, along with the subtle laugh lines. :)

    xo
    Barbara in Northern CA

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  52. Thanks for this honest post! I also have a hard time as Christmas approaches, too many reminders of family ties I no longer have, and too many TV specials (which I try to avoid), songs, and magazine articles about perfect homes, families and decorations.

    Like others have said, nice to know we aren't alone. BTW, the pants look terrific and your laugh lines add interest to your pretty face.

    xo
    Barbara in northern CA

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  53. Now that I had a few extra minutes I went back and read all the comments...in the midst of my little meltdown yesterday I did actually think of Suzanne and how strong she is to have endured all that she has this year. Really does make my small problems seem even smaller, and when I think about it, they are actually inconveniences! So happy to hear Suzanne is moving into a new home.

    Linda
    xo

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    1. i so agree with you linda. suzanne is THE posterwoman for strength and courage. that paired with her positive attitude is why i love her. thank you and everyone else for mentioning this. xoxo

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  54. Luckily for me I'm so busy i have no time to feel my feelings.but if I did I'm sure they wouldn't be all sunshine and rainbows.

    Thank god for brisk walks with music blasting. That shakes it up for me.

    Hope all the love and understanding shared by everybody makes you feel better.

    No what if's!
    xo Jane

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  55. Very Blue, even though I have so much to look forward to over Christmas (my kids will be out with me, well they're 20 and 18 so not little kids). But I'm having a lot of probs with extended family which is making me very sad and yes, blue. Maybe baking will cheer me up.

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  56. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  57. Oh, in the rainy northwest, I can count on the blues. I know the weather is a big part of it because when the sun comes out, it feels like your brain has hit the 'on' button. Everyone here seems to swear by the lightboxes, but I can't afford one right now. I do think there is something about Christmas... a sort of forced cheer, and once the kids are grown... I don't know. It just feels a little harder to 'do' Christmas. I thought it was just me.

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  58. I remember a cousin of mine (older than myself) wearing her cardigan backwards. It brought back that memory of her. Yours looks great. Sorry to hear you are feeling blue. I too get that way around the holidays. I sit and think of all the people in my family who are not with us any more and it gets me down. I could do without the holidays altogether but for the sake of others, I try to be positive and celebrate all the things I do have and all the people who i love who are still here with us. I hope you feel better soon.

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  59. Love the outfit. The pants are darling and how clever and retro of you to turn the cardi around.
    I usually get very blue at this time of year. The excess everywhere usually eats away at me. I'm not sure why, but this year I'm feeling better than usual. That could all change in the next week as we get closer though. I haven't done any shopping yet :0

    I hope you feel rosy soon and snap out of the blues.

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  60. Usually I feel pretty crappy (and crabby) this time of year. All that fuss about Christmas, 98% of it a million miles from the true meaning of Christmas. But this year, I don't know why, I'm feeling quite happy and pleased with the whole thing. I'm going to be late with my presents, mailings, cards, etc. but you know what? I don't give a crap. So I'm late. So sue me. Nobody's died or anything, so I will do my Christmas as and when the spirit moves me.

    Cheers from England,
    Rosemary from www.foreveronthecatwalkoflife.blogspot.com

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  61. Sitting in a cafe with my daughter yesterday and the christmas carols brought the tears on without warning as I lost my darling beloved mum in law in July and this christmas will be the first in over 30 years that we have not had her with us ....blue beyond measure :(

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  62. Yes, blue here too. But my grown children are used to it always being an extremely trying time for me. Now that they have their own families with young children, it's encouraging to see that they're creating cozy, wonderful Christmases for the next generation. It reminds me that I've at least done one thing very well. I hope that, like a commenter earlier, one year I suddenly am over all the grieving from Christmases past and can just learn to love it.

    Love your close-up. Thank you.

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kindness is never out of style.